3 Self-love habits

Hello all. I wanted to share three things I have been doing lately to love and care for myself lately:

Care for my hair: I’m trying to care for my hair at least as much as I can, in addition to doing my best to improve sleep, diet, and exercise. In 2019, I cut off a lot of my hair (I had a pixie cut) because I did not want to face the reality that my hair was thinning and shedding nor look into taking care of it – which was really just me not wanting to take care of myself. I wish I knew better how to take care of it and I am learning, so me deciding to grow my hair out long now (at least to a length I will be comfortable with) is mainly to remind myself to take care of myself. It feels like a lot of work now to take care of myself, but my hair is also indicative of my health, and my health is my wealth !
Appreciate my heritage culture: For most of my childhood and teenage years, I was very proud of my Taiwanese heritage. I was proud to the point where I had plans to go back to Taiwan for university, and to be honest, I was quite racist. It took me becoming close friends with people other than my ethnicity to break that. While I do believe a lot of that pride was genuine joy in the history and culture of Taiwan, a good chunk of it was also deeply rooted in shame (hence, the racism). Long story short, as I entered more of the real world in the states after college, that racism turned inward as I learned how much people looked like me are reject in western societies. It has taken a while, but I am taking steps to return to and love my inner child in this way, to delight in my culture again. I knew I needed help with this, especially with regards to racial trauma, so I have been working with a therapist who specializes in racial trauma (among many other things) for the past couple of years. It has been really nice working with her because she has all my same demographics, but is older (i.e., Taiwanese-American Christian woman). I have also been trying to eat some favorite Taiwanese foods of mine, leading to more grocery trips to 99 Ranch Market – a very nostalgic place for me. I have been listening to more Mandarin music again, finding Mandarin podcasts to listen to, as well as finding Taiwanese youtubers to watch. I have also been learning more about decolonizing and how that shows up in society and religious circles. I recently changed home churches, and it has been healing to me not only have a senior pastor that is Asian, but also being a part of a religious community that celebrates ethnic and racial diversity the way that they do. Early next year, I also plan to go to Taiwan again, as I have not returned since the passing of my mother four years ago.
Weight: Since last summer, I have reached a weight I have not ever reached in my life. I felt ashamed about how my thighs touch now, and I knew people noticed the extra weight in my face. Granted, I am not overweight and am actually still well within a normal BMI range, but I have just never weighed this much before. However, one incredibly positive thing I have noticed with this weight gain is that my period cycles have become more normal. This says so much about my years of trying to be skinnier and under a number on the scale – essentially, that was not the healthiest route to go. This does not give me free reign to be reckless about my weight and my lifestyle, but it is definitely having me challenge beauty standards I have always held. My goal now is to maintain this weight, and to keep paying attention to my body to what it needs (as best as I can, as I confess I am not perfect at this yet).